He was [C]just a lonely tortoise [F]looking for a [C]home
His tiny feet were blistered with the [D7]miles he'd had to [G7]roam
I [C]found him in a pet shop, on his [F]cheek there was a [C]tear
And painted on his little back was [G7]"twenty pence to clear"
He's a [F]faithful friend, the tortoise, he'll [C]love you till the [G7]end
And [C]you won't need a person with a [G7]tortoise for a [C]friend
I took him from the pet shop, tied to a piece of string.
I'm sure that he was happy for I thought I heard him sing.
I took him to my sports car. We had many's the mile to go.
I tied him to the bumper. He was grateful for the tow. CHORUS
In winter he would hibernate. Yes, we'd both retire,
And when his little feet got cold, I'd place him on the fire.
In summer by the swimming pool, I was so proud of him.
I'd throw him in and then he'd sink. I don't think that he could swim. CHORUS
Then came the day
that's coming to all creatures great and small.
drunken driver hit my friend. He smashed him against the wall.
When I arrived, all I could find were little bits of shell.
I made them into plectrums. I know my plectrums well. CHORUS